Dinner with Her Husband

PART 2: “WHEN A FILIPINO LIVED WITH THE INDIANS”

I KILLED THE COW

One of my day off, Vanaja thought me how to make a chapati and pratha. Before the night came, I decided to do some grocery since I believed it is nice and fair to also share my own native food for dinner. As I arrived home, I cheerfully announced that I will be cooking ‘sinabawan na baka’ (beef soup). As usual, I washed the meat to prepare. It was during this time when Vanaja saw me. She came to me shaking and shrilly asked, “Is that a beef?”.

I was startled.

She looked closer to confirm it, “Is that a blood? Oh no! No! No! Take that away! Please!”. Before I can even answer that, ‘Yes, it is indeed a beef’, she flee in obvious panic, called her husband to talk to me and hided in their bedroom.

Pala requested me to thoroughly clean the kitchen and everything I used after I finished. I said I was sorry and that all along I thought it was pork that they cannot eat but beef. Honestly, didn't have any idea so I decided to discard it anyway. I ended up eating my dinner at the hawker center that night - and again, I was really sorry. I didn't mean to disrespect their food preferences and I was disappointed for the spoilt night.

A MEAN REJECTION

The next day, I woke up because of the loud sound of voices. I knew it was coming from my housemates in the living room and the rest are unfamiliar. I opened my door and peeked. I saw three women which I do not recognise. They were obviously not Indians and are noticeably shouting in front of the two couples. I closed the door while I waited for the heated discussion to end.

As soon as I heard the door slammed, there was a complete silence. That second, my heart sank. Slowly, I opened my door again and there was Vanaja trying to control her tears in front of me. I asked her why and she broke the news of disgusting rejection. I can’t believe that after a few months, the landladies was trying to take back our rented unit. They had changed their mind of letting the Indians live in their flat - I mean, what - letting the 'Indians'?

Allowing the Indians to stay in their unit while they look for other races to occupy their house is a complete scam of ‘people-using and racial discrimination'. They just let us pay for their empty months. Or at least they thought of some alibis of expelling them without using their ethnicity. But they chose to give insults. Anyway, they gave us a month to evacuate.

THE BIG FIGHT

Few days past, I arrived from work around 11pm. Tiredly, I directly march to my room. Because I wanted some fresh air while I rest in bed, I opened the window which is adjacent to Vanaja and Pala’s. It was then that I overheard the couple screaming at each other. There were bangs and heavy drops from time to time. Even though I can’t understand their language, I knew they we’re having a big fight. I hope it is only due to the stressful situations like hunting and transferring to a new house. At the same time, Vanaja is due to give birth anytime soon. Sadly, this situation is just a start of more each night…

GONE BACK TO INDIA

When finally one quiet night came, I started to pack my things up. Pala, calls my name and softly knocked at my door. He was in big smile while he told me that Vanaja had left to give birth in India. I felt a little bit heartbroken knowing that she will not be around for quite sometime. Pala noticed my gloomy face and asked me how I am. His question led us to a deep conversation about the life he left in India, his sisters and their dowries, his view about their caste system, his sacrifices to earn enough for his family, his arranged marriage, his dreams and plans in the near future, his reasons of working in a foreign country, his experience about rejection for promotion and what he felt about all his stories. This moment melted my heart as I look straight in his eyes. It made me realised that even they are different from me, we are all humans - with feelings and aspirations. Our talk had put myself together on the ground and reminded me why I am here as diaspora. I closed my door thankful that after all, at least we managed to get by.

BIG NEWS

It was almost a couple of months since we all moved out from the unit when I got a call from Pala. From his joyful voice, I knew Vanaja finally gave birth to a baby girl. His delight made me realised that not all Indian fathers are desperate to have a son and grumbles for having a daughter. I knew enough that the baby girl is loved and accepted by her parents. I can hear a father whom regardless of their child’s orientation, almost die of happiness to bring me the great news. Anyway, he ended his call by inviting me to celebrate that milestone with a hotpot dinner. Of course, I gladly accepted his invitation.

MY FAMILY

I rattled when I realised it was 6:09 PM. I told my boyfriend over the phone that I am meeting up my family. “Really? You didn’t told me your Mom and Dad will be visiting you”, he was surprised.

“No. I am meeting up my Indian family”, I said goodbye and hung up. I had been living away with my parent and siblings but my heart is full. There was no force when my ex-housemates became my family by heart. Though it was evident that my stay with them is not picture perfect, I had loved and missed them like they were my own.

WORDS FROM AN INDIAN

I met Pala with his proud smile. He explained to me that Vanaja will be extending her stay in India to nurse their newborn. He ushered me to the counter and he ordered for me the food that I chose. The waitress stared at us like we just committed some crime. It took a while before she was able to compose herself and noted our order.

As we settled at the table, I can see she was talking to another man about us.

"Never mind about them", Pala shrugged.

We enjoyed our meal with few more stares from the people around us.

“Don’t worry, I got them a lot”, he again assured.

He was sincerely sorry for our premature move-out, “You see, we had been thrown out because of who we are. But rejection is not fatal anyway. What is more dangerous is for you to despise your own self in the process. Perhaps, these people have problems embracing their own self. Do not be like them ‘cause the most important person to accept you is yourself.”

I felt the warm of my soup as I sip while I listened to him go on. But I think the warmth is more than what the hotpot had brought me.

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